I'll Be There For Christmas
by klaruus
Summary: It's Christmas time, the most beautiful time of the year. Unless you are alone. And Tony is. Tiva!


**Hi everyone! So here is a short Christmas story and I hope you like it.**

 _ **I'll Be There for Christmas**_

It was that time of a year again. It was Christmas time. Everyone seemed to have already made plans for Christmas except one Special Agent. Tony didn't know how to spend it this year. The only person he wanted to spend it with was somewhere across the ocean. Somewhere far away from him. And the fact that he could just call her wasn't exactly helping. He didn't want to just hear her. He wanted to see her in real, wanted to touch her, to hug her and kiss her. He wanted her to feel real.

"Tony, are you with us?" Gibbs distracted him from his thoughts.

"Sure, boss." Tony looked at him and forced a smile continuing to work on his computer.

Gibbs looked at Ellie thinking she might know what was going on with Tony but she just shrugged with her shoulders. Looking at McGee for the same reason, the young agent just shook his head and looked back at his computer screen. Gibbs wanted to ask Tony what was wrong but stopped himself as he watched Tony working. He could sense that something was bothering his minds but decided to let the man handle it himself.

Tony floated away to his thoughts again. Christmas. It was only a couple of days left and he was going to spend it alone. Alone for the first time since he could remember. Alone for Christmas.

Tony stood up from his chair and headed to the toilets, wanting to freshen himself up a bit. He couldn't keep being distracted all the time. He wasn't putting all of the effort on the case that needed to be solved, he wasn't being a good agent. An agent that everyone expected him to be, without showing any emotion.

Gibbs followed him behind as he was getting worried about his agent. Closing the door behind him he leaned against them and looked at Tony. "What's the matter with you today?"

"Nothing, boss. I'm fine."

"You don't look fine." He looked at his eyes, "What's going on?"

"Nothing, I'm telling you I'm fine. I better get back to work. We have a case to solve." He tried walking out of the restroom but Gibbs blocked his path.

"Tony, if anything was wrong, you would tell me, right?"

Tony looked at his boss and saw worry in his eyes. He swallowed then said, "Of course boss."

Gibbs didn't believe him. He knew something was wrong with Tony, knew something was on his mind. But he also knew what it was like when you hurt too much to tell anyone and that's why he stepped away from the door and let Tony walk out of the restroom. When he left, Gibbs sighed and whispered to himself, "What's on your mind this time, Tony. I wish you would've told me," and walked back to his desk.

Tony was startled when he got a letter being dropped on his desk by his favorite mailman, Bill. He looked at the letter than at Bill who just shrugged, "I don't know where it's from but it's for you."

"Oooooh Tony got an admirer," Ellie laughed while Gibbs knew it wasn't the greatest idea to bother Tony today. And he was right as Tony growled towards Ellie,

"Why don't you mind your own business and your own perfect little life and leave others alone."

"What got into you today?" Ellie backed off giving up.

"I'm _fine_! I already told all of you that I'm _fine_."

"Whatever you say, Tony. But we are here, you have to know that you have us. If you need to talk we're all happy to help." McGee started to get worried as well.

Tony just rolled his eyes and sighed loudly, taking the letter and opening it. It was a feminine writing, definitely, but it didn't mention who was the sender so he could only guess from what was written on it

 _Christmas, a time when no one should be alone.  
It'll take some time but  
I'll be there for Christmas, always._

 _Love_

Tony could only imagine who it was from but he couldn't allow himself to believe it was from Ziva. He couldn't believe because he was sure he'd be disappointed eventually. He crumpled a letter and threw it in the trash, stood up and left leaving Ellie, McGee and Gibbs worrying about the special agent and their friend.

When both Ellie and McGee looked at Gibbs, wanting answers he didn't have there was nothing to say than a simple, "What?"

"Boss, something's going on with Tony." McGee stated.

"You think I haven't noticed? He's been like this for a week now and it's getting worse. I noticed. I asked him but he doesn't want to talk."

Ellie looked at McGee than back at Gibbs, "Boss, I think you should go after him. You're as a father to him. You have to make him talk."

Gibbs looked at both of his agents and when he saw they were being serious he followed after Tony.

When he couldn't find him nowhere around NCIS he went to his apartment only to find it empty ass well. Deciding to go home instead, he got into his car and drove off. When he got to his home he went down to his basement right away, intending to pour himself a cup of bourbon and do some work on the boat to clear his mind and try to figure out what was bothering Tony so much. Walking down to his basement he slowed down when he noticed someone sitting down there with a jar of bourbon.

"Hi. I thought you wouldn't mind if I let myself in. I poured myself some bourbon as well, knew you'd come eventually."

"Tony, what's going on with you?" Gibbs asked as he seated himself next to him and poured himself some bourbon as well. He took a sip then turned back to his agent waiting for answers.

Tony chuckled, "It's hard not to get emotional around Christmas. Everyone seems to anticipate it while I… while I hope it goes away as soon as possible."

Gibbs couldn't believe the words he was hearing as Tony was the one that loved Christmas the most. The one that wanted to build up the Christmas spirit at the end of November. The one that couldn't believe how others acted like it was nothing special because to him it always was special. He kept quiet letting his agent speak.

"You know when a certain thing reminds you of someone important that isn't there anymore, you can't help but wish it goes away. That's what Christmas is for me, I wish it goes away." He sighed, "It's not the same anymore. I sometimes wish I could rewind the time but I can't. I'm stuck here and it's killing me."

Gibbs started to realize what it was all about. He knew that Tony and Ziva were once involved and he wasn't intending on stopping it as long as it didn't interfere with their work and when he saw that they only got better and trusted each other more he knew his rule #12 wasn't exactly necessary for everyone. He knew it broke Tony when Ziva left, wanting to find her true self. He knew how much it hurt Tony to be left behind but he eventually got over it. At least that's what he made others think. Apparently this wasn't true and now here he was, devastated Tony wishing Christmas would pass as soon as possible because he couldn't stand being reminded of her. "Tony. You can't make the Christmas go away. You have so many beautiful memories for it."

"Yes. With her."

Gibbs sighed and took another sip of whiskey, "It's hard. It'll always be hard. You will never get over it, you will just learn to live with it and eventually you will realize that living in the past does more harm than good. You will miss so many opportunities if you don't let yourself move on."

"You know, I got a letter today."

"Yes. I saw you throw it away."

"I don't know who it was from and I can't let myself guess who it was from. I don't want to be disappointed in the end."

"I understand, Tony. I understand you completely but you have to know, we are here for you. You gotta talk to someone."

Tony nodded and placed the jar on the table then left Gibbs' house.

### _ **CHRISTMAS' EVE**_ ###

The team has finished the case and everyone was heading home or to where they'd be spending the evening except for Tony who was still sitting at his desk staring at nowhere in particular. When Gibbs got to his desk to grab a coat and head home he saw his senior field agent still there but one thing they both hadn't noticed yet was that behind them she stood silently, listening to their conversation, her eyes full of tears at the sight of her family.

"Tony. Go home." Gibbs almost whispered at the young man.

"I can't go home."

"Can't or won't?"

When Tony didn't answer he grabbed a chair and sat down next to him, "Go home and do something that makes you happy. Go watch a movie or something."

"I can't, I always watched movies with _her_. I can't."

"Then do something that brings up good memories of her. Do something that will ease the pain."

Tony sighed then looked at his boss, "I don't want to do anything today. I want to forget but at the same time I don't want to. I don't want to go home, I don't want to be reminded of her, I don't want for my whole world to spin around her. I don't want to think about her every single second. I can't and I don't want to go home."

"Why not?"

"Because it's not a home without her. And it's Christmas. I don't want to be alone for Christmas."

"You won't be alone for Christmas. I promised." She whispered but was loud enough for both agents to turn around and look at her. Smiling at her, Gibbs stood up and left, leaving the two of them alone.

"Ziva." Was all that Tony managed to say.

"Tony."

"You really are here." He walked towards her taking her in his hands.

"I told you I'll be there for Christmas." She looked at his green eyes, down at his lips and soon they were having the most passionate kiss two can imagine. And it happened to be under the mistletoe which left the two of them laughing as they left the NCIS building, together.

 _No one should be alone for Christmas! So guys find someone you love, give a chance to someone that loves you._

 _I wish you all a Merry Christmas!_

 _LOVE_

 _Klaruus  
_


End file.
